Is This Abuse? How Do I Deal With It Again?
Question by Sara: is this abuse? how do i deal with it again?
i’ll just give you the short version, here goes~
mom would physically abuse me and my dad (dad much more so.) this was when i was 5 to when i was almost 11, she got arrested a week before my birthday.
ever since 8th grade (about 2 1/2 – 3 years ago) i noticed my dad had been acting more and more rudely towards me. i brushed it off as “normal” but now i’m not sure how much more of it i can take. in fact i’m almost thinking it’s verbal abuse.
i’ll admit even though i’m a good kid i am a teenager so once in a while i will do some adventurous stuff but it never involves anything like drugs or stuff like that, but if you want to know some of the things he does/says:
“my job is my top priority in my life. you come after.”
me: you treat me like everything bad in your life is my fault!! dad: well yeah most of it is actually
“what? are you a moron or something?”
“i hate you”
“go to hell”
oh, and my favorite “i wish you were never born.”
one time at the airport, he literally ditched me without my ticket so i didn’t know where to go. then when i did find it, he moved when i sat next to him. whenever i call him on the phone, his answer is “what do you want?” instead of something like “hi”
on my 14th birthday party, he yelled at me and all of my friends because he was in a bad mood
once in awhile he does hit me, but its only on the hand or face….nothing compared to how my mom was
meanwhile in front of anyone else, he acts completely nice to me.
i’m worried he’s going to gateway into physical abuse like my mom was, but i’m not sure if this is even verbal abuse or just strict parenting….what do you think? what should i do? (no nearby relatives)
Best answer:
Answer by B.
No parent should talk to their child that way. I get that he may have emotional issues thanks to your abusive mother, but HELLO, you are dealing with it even more harshly, since you are young. He should be even more supportive of you and showering you with love, because he knows firsthand you had a tough life. I would definitely talk to a guidance counselor at school to try and get some counseling between you and your dad because this is ridiculous.
Worse case scenario, write and email to Dr. Phil. He would tell your dad a thing or two.
Answer by karu_sonya
I’m sorry, that this is happening to you. That is definitely verbal abuse, and I have been through it as well. Tell an authority figure, or go to your school counselor. I think that would help your dad, and you, in the long run. Good luck (: